Speaking to the deceased

Question:-

Is it permissible to speak to family members, friends etc. who have passed away? Can we speak to them at the grave and tell them how our life is going? If this is allowed, will they be able to know what we saying?

Answer:-

It is recorded in the Hadith that any person that passes by the Qabr of his brother, whom he knew in the world, and greets him, then Allah Ta’ala returns the Rooh of the deceased (to him) so that he is able to respond to the Salaam.

There are two things that are proven from this narration. The first is, the deceased has the ability of hearing (with the permission of Allah Ta’ala.). The second, the deceased being able to hear, and us making the deceased hear (our conversation), is not within our ability. If Allah Ta’ala wants them to hear, then they will hear, and if He doesn’t want them to hear, then they will not be able to hear.

Hence, it is proven from the above narration that, at the time of Salaam they are able to hear and they even respond to the Salaam. As for other times, it cannot be said with certainty that the deceased is able to hear or not. [Anwar-ul-Bayaan Pg.350 / 351 Vol.3] It is perhaps on this basis that we make Salaam to the deceased when entering the graveyard, as they are able to hear our Salaam and even respond.      

It is recorded in Fataawa Darul Uloom Deoband that, according to the researched view of the Hanafis, the deceased are unable to hear the speech of the living. This is proven from the verse:

انك لا تسمع الموتي

Verily you cannot make the deceased hear

Re:- Fataawa Darul Uloom Deoband Pg.296 Vol.5

Further, it is recorded in Fataawa Darul Uloom Deoband that, the Mas’ala regarding the deceased being able to hear the living is controversial amongst the scholars. The Hanafis are of the opinion that the deceased are unable to hear the speech of the living. This is the view of Hadrat Aisha Radiallahu Anha as well.

Re:- Fataawa Darul Uloom Deoband Pg.298 Vol.5 (Question no.3150)

Based on the above, one should not inform the deceased of his condition, as there is no guarantee of them being able to hear the living. Secondly, there is no apparent benefit in informing them of one’s condition. If one carries out good deeds and thereby pleases His creator, then it will be of benefit to him, whilst the evil actions perpetrated by one will be to his own detriment. We hope that the above matter is clarified.

ALLAH TA’ALA KNOWS BEST!

ANSWERED BY:

Mufti Mohammed Desai

Date: 13 Shabaan 1444 / 06 March 2023