QUESTION:
Could I be advised in detail as to what to look for in a spouse aside from Deen and Akhlaaq?
ANSWER:
The Hadith states that if the Deen and character of a man is in order, then the guardians are commanded to get their daughters married to him. This indicates that if he is blessed with wealth or good looks, etc. then this is a bonus. The criterion should be Deen and good character. This subject matter is corroborated by another narration which states, “A person passed by Rasulullah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam. He asked, what do you say regarding him? They said, it is likely that if he proposes then his Nikah will be enacted, if he intercedes then his intercession will be accepted, and if he speaks then he will be given a hearing. Rasulullah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam then kept silent. Then a man from the poor Muslims passed. Rasulullah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam asked, what do you say regarding him? They said, it is likely that if he proposes then his Nikah will not be enacted, if he intercedes then his intercession will not be accepted, and if he speaks then he will not be given a hearing. Then Rasulullah Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said, “This one is better than the earth full of the first one.” This narration clarifies the matter that wealth, looks, profession is secondary and not the criterion in Nikah.
وَأخرج التِّرْمِذِيّ وَابْن ماجة وَالْحَاكِم وَصَححهُ عَن أبي هُرَيْرَة قَالَ: قَالَ رَسُول الله صلى الله عَلَيْهِ وَسلم إِذا خطب إِلَيْكُم من ترْضونَ دينه وخلقه فَزَوجُوهُ إِن لَا تَفعلُوا تكن فتْنَة فِي الأَرْض وَفَسَاد عريض
حدَّثنا إبْرَاهِيمُ بنُ حَمْزَةَ حدَّثَنا ابنُ أبي حازِمٍ عَنْ أبيهِ عَنْ سَهْلٍ قَالَ: مَرَّ رجُلٌ علَى رَسُول الله صلى الله عَلَيْهِ وَسلم فَقَالَ: مَا تَقُولُونَ فِي هاذا؟ قالُوا حَرِيٌّ إنْ خَطَبَ أنْ يُنْكَحَ شَفَعَ أنْ يُشَفَّعَ وإنْ قَالَ أنْ يُسْتَمَعَ، قَالَ: ثُمَّ سَكَتَ، فمَرَّ رجلٌ مِنْ فُقَرَاءِ المُسْلِمينَ، فَقَالَ: مَا تَقُولُونَ فِي هاذا؟ قالُوا: حَرِيُّ إنْ خَطَبَ أنْ لَا يُنْكَحَ، وإنْ شَفَعَ أنْ لَا يُشَفَّعَ، وإنْ قَالَ أنْ لَا يُسْتَمَعَ، فَقَالَ رسولُ الله صلى الله عَلَيْهِ وَسلم: هاذا خيْرٌ مِنْ ملْءِ الأرْضِ مِثْلَ هاذا. (عمدة القاري ص87 ج20)
ALLAH TA’ALA ALONE IN HIS INFINITE KNOWLEDGE KNOWS BEST!
ANSWERED BY:
Mufti Mohammed Desai Saheb
Date: 21 Safr 1446 / 26 August 2024
