Maintenance of children after divorce

Question:-

I am married for many years and I have 3 children (2 girls aged 13 and 8, and a 3 year old son).

My wife, after many many years of being unhappy in our marriage, is determined to end the marriage.

I have never had any intention of divorce, but it seems like she has been contemplating it for a while, and is now determined to end it. Mufti Saheb, I find myself in a very foreign position and with no knowledge on divorce, settlements, and maintenance of children etc.

These are my children and Insha-Allah I will make every effort to ensure that they are okay and comfortable.

My wife was saying that I will need to pay her a fee for looking after the children because she will not be working as she will have to take care of children at home.

Mufti Saheb, please assist me so that I may have some idea of what the Shariah dictates as my responsibility.

I still have an intention of getting married again so I will basically need to look after two families.

Answer:-

In the case of divorce, you will be entitled to custody of your daughters when they reach the age of nine, and you will be entitled to custody of your son when he reaches the age of seven. Since, your eldest daughter is now 13, you are entitled to custody of this daughter. As for the other daughter, the mother will enjoy custody for the next few months until she reaches the age of nine, and thereafter, custody will be passed over to you. Your son is still small and will therefore remain with his mother until the age of 7.

You will be responsible for providing food, clothing, accommodation, education and all medical bills. This in no way means that you must subscribe to a medical aid plan, which is Haraam according to our Fatwa department. However, you will be responsible for any medical bills incurred.

You will have to maintain your wife during her Iddat period (which is three menstrual cycles) in a moderate manner, as you have maintained and provided for her during the marriage. However, if you are willing to voluntarily assist her after her Iddat for attending to the children (as she will not be working), then you are at liberty to do so, and you will be rewarded for assisting a Muslim sister that is in need. This will most definitely be regarded as a meritorious act in the court of Allah Ta’ala. However, she cannot force you to pay her a fee for taking care of the children if you are not willing to agree to the arrangement. She is also at liberty of relinquishing her rights and ceding the rights of custody over to you, if she is not willing to take care of the children. We hope that the above explanation clarifies all matters.

وَيُعْتَبَرُ فِي هَذِهِ النَّفَقَةِ مَا يَكْفِيهَا، وَهُوَ الْوَسَطُ مِنْ الْكِفَايَةِ، وَهِيَ غَيْرُ مُقَدَّرَةٍ؛ لِأَنَّ هَذِهِ النَّفَقَةَ نَظِيرُ نَفَقَةِ النِّكَاحِ فَيُعْتَبَرُ فِيهَا مَا يُعْتَبَرُ فِي نَفَقَةِ النِّكَاحِ لِلْمُعْتَدَّةِ إذَا لَمْ تُخَاصِمْ فِي نَفَقَتِهَا (الفتاوي الهندية ص551 ج1)

(وَتَجِبُ) النَّفَقَةُ بِأَنْوَاعِهَا عَلَى الْحُرِّ (لِطِفْلِهِ) يَعُمُّ الْأُنْثَى وَالْجَمْعَ (الْفَقِيرِ) الْحُرِّ،(رد المحتار ص612 ج3)

شوہر کی طلاق اور ختم عدت کے بعد عورت کو شوہر سے نان ونفقہ رہائشی  مکان وغیرہ کسی چیز کے مطالبہ کا حق نہیں (فتاوی قاسمیہ ص۶۷۷ ج۱۷)

من لها الحضانة لا تجبر عليها ان ابت لاحتمال ان تعجز عن الحضانة (مجمع الأنهر ص490 ج1)

ALLAH TA’ALA KNOWS BEST!

ANSWERED BY:

Mufti Mohammed Desai

Date: 03 Rajab 1444 / 25 January 2023