Desire For Marriage
QUESTION:
I am in my 30’s and would like to get married. I had a few prospective suitors over the years but nothing worked out. For the past 3 years, there hasn’t been anyone coming forward. It has become very challenging to find a suitable match though the normal channels. Would it be permissible to send my profile to a matchmaker to assist in this regard?
ANSWER:
From the outset, it is the desire of every young woman who is of marriageable age to marry the most suitable, compatible, kind and loving husband. However, everyone in this world has their own challenge. A woman who’s married may have marital problems. If she does not have marital problems, she may desire children but perhaps she is barren. This is her test. She may have the best husband and have the most beautiful children but perhaps her children may become a means of test for her. In essence, where will it stop. So, ultimately, Allah Ta’ala knows what is best for you and when it is best for you. This is what the Quraan echoes:
وعسى أن تكرهوا شيئًا وهو خير لكم وعسى أن تحبوا شَيْئًا وَهُوَ شَرٌّ لَكُمْ وَاللَّهُ يَعْلَم وَأَنتُمْ لَا
تعلمون ( البقرة آ 216)
“Perhaps you dislike a thing while it is good for you, and perhaps you love a thing while it is bad for you. Allah knows, and you do not know.”
While it is natural to feel moments of sadness, loneliness, or uncertainty about the future, know well that such feelings do not diminish your faith, nor do they mean that Allah Ta’ala has forgotten you. Rather, every stage of life carries its own tests and its own opportunities for closeness to Allah Ta’ala. Sometimes, what we long for is delayed by the wisdom of Allah Ta’ala, not by His neglect. Allah Ta’ala alone knows the right time, the right person, and the right circumstances, far better than we do.
Allah Ta’ala says in the Quraan:
إِنَّ مَعَ ٱلْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا
“After every difficulty there is ease.”
Rasulullah Sallahu Alaihi Wasallam taught us that every difficulty a believer faces becomes a means of purification and elevation:
عَنْ أَبِي سَعِيدٍ الْخُدْرِيِّ، وَأَبِي هُرَيْرَةَ، عَنِ النَّبِيِّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ: مَا يُصِيبُ الْمُسْلِمَ مِنْ نَصَبٍ، وَلاَ وَصَبٍ، وَلاَّهَمٍّ، وَلاَ حَزَنٍ، وَلاَ أَذًى، وَلاَ غَمٍّ، حَتَّى الشَّوْكَةُ يُشَاكُهَا، إِلاَّ كَفَّرَ اللَّهُ بِهَا مِنْ خَطَايَاهُ
“No fatigue, illness, anxiety, sorrow, harm, or distress befalls a Muslim—even the prick of a thorn—except that Allah expiates some of his sins because of it.” (Ṣaḥiḥ Bukhari)
Allah Ta’ala is watching your restraint. Rasulullah Sallahu Alaihi Wasallam also said:
وعن أبي يحيى صهيب بن سنان رضي الله عنه قال: قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم “عجبا لأمر المؤمن إن أمره كله له خير، وليس ذلك لأحد إلا للمؤمن : إن أصابته سراء شكر فكان خيراً له، وإن أصابته ضراء صبر فكان خيراً له” (رواه مسلم).
“How wonderful is the affair of the believer! All of his affairs are good for him. If something pleasing happens to him, he is grateful and that is good for him. If something harmful happens to him, he is patient and that is good for him.”
Continue to turn to Allah Ta’ala in supplication, for He says:
وَقَالَ رَبُّكُمُ ادْعُونِي أَسْتَجِبْ لَكُمْ
“And your Rabb said, Call upon Me, I will respond to you.” (Qur’ān 40:60)
Ask Him for what is best for you in this life and the next. If marriage is good for your Deen and Dunya, He will open its doors in a way you may never have imagined. And if He delays it, know that every moment of patience is being recorded with Him.
Now, coming to the queried scenario, if your profile does not contain any pictures and if you are one hundred percent sure that the matchmaker will not send out your profile to any strange men, rather it will only be shared with women such as mothers of prospective suitors, then it will be permissible to do so. We have also attached a link below for a Wazifah which has proven to be very beneficial for receiving a good proposal. You may practice upon it also.
Wazifah For A Good Proposal
May Allah Ta’ala bless you with what is best for you, Aameen!
ALLAH TA’ALA ALONE IN HIS INFINITE KNOWLEDGE KNOWS BEST!
ANSWERED BY:
Mufti Abdul Kader Fazlani
Date: 11 Jumaadal-Ulaa 1448 / 22 October 2026
CHECKED AND APPROVED BY:
Mufti Yacoob Vally Saheb